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As fate had it…



I was in 4th grade. I remember seeing a little boy after church. We were in the parish hall waiting in the breakfast line. He was wearing wranglers, cowboy boots, and a cowboy hat. I saw him standing there with his mom and grandparents. Then I remember being in 8th grade and telling my mom that I was going to marry him someday because I loved him. I bet she thought that was funny at the time…

Those are the first memories I have of meeting my husband. Fast forward to now, we have been married 12 years and together 22 years. We have 3 beautiful children and we are so grateful to have our little family. I truly know in my heart, that God made us for each other. It hasn’t always been easy, but there is no one else that I would ever want to share my life with. 

When we got married, I had no idea that I would have the issues that I do. We both seemed so healthy. I had only started to have some debilitating symptoms in graduate school. The migraines that developed were intense and I sometimes needed him to come pick me up from class because I could not drive home.  Little did we know, but that was a start to many more medical issues in our future. 

Shortly after I graduated, we got married and tried to have children. We had been in a relationship since middle school at that point (12 years) and we were both wanting what came next in life. We wanted children. I got pregnant easily, but we ended up losing 3 babies before having a successful pregnancy. It was heart wrenching for both of us, but looking back I realize how much we grew as a couple because of these experiences. Those trying times also brought us to a new level of closeness to God.  I wouldn't trade that for the world.

After my 6th pregnancy and 3rd child, I was diagnosed with Lupus, RA, and Fibro. It was hard to believe, but it did explain why I was so sick and in so much pain. My husband and I have had to learn how to adapt to the illness. He had to learn how to be more understanding when I couldn’t do normal day to day tasks. I had to learn how to communicate better to let him know how I was feeling. I was brought up to just tough it out and not complain, so it is hard for me to constantly share my suffering with him.

Over the years, he has educated himself on autoimmune diseases and has been more understanding when I don’t feel good. I know most men could never handle the struggles we have gone through.  He sometimes forgets that I have limitations, but I just have to remind him that I am struggling that day.

What I love most about him is the way he loves our children.  I am blessed to have him as a husband. He is our provider, our spiritual leader, and my best friend. I often pray at night asking God to gift my children with someone as special as the one he gifted me. 


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